as i please

Would I be happier if I moved back out to the ranch and got up early every day and did the dishes and operated ropes course activities and let the horses in and out of their pen to eat? Would I? Would I be happier if I lived in an 8x10 and ate breakfast, lunch and dinner with my co-workers, and watched movies at night with the volume almost off because the walls are paper-thin? Would I be happier if I had to shower and go to the washroom communally and clean up after other people in the bathroom and constantly have to turn down the thermostat that customers keep cranking up?

Sometimes I really think I would be. I look back on my time there with rose-coloured glasses. Maybe it's because I feel cooped up in this office, and because I'm not doing what I should be doing anyway, so I might as well do something fun in the interim.

And because I kind of don't want to go back to school in September; last year I took quite the academic beating and I don't know if I have it in me to pay a zillion dollars just to get it again.

I wish I were free to do as I please, I really do.